Wimberley's toe nails

[ole razzy]

Daniel Wimberely, sort your toe nails out mate. They are truly boggin. You have a fungal infection that needs treating. You put me right off my bacon roll at the beach cafe at Harve des Pas this morning.

[Ashley]

What kind of an example is this to set?

Everyone knows that if you look after your feet and your feet will look after you.

http://www.lookafteryourfeet.com/freeflexitol.htm

[Dylan]

Daniel Wimberely, sort your toe nails out mate. They are truly boggin. You have a fungal infection that needs treating. You put me right off my bacon roll at the beach cafe at Harve des Pas this morning.

Did you consider the possibility that you put Daniel off his lettuce hamash topped with piccalilly by staring at his feet? I mean dude, how damned inconsiderate can you get???

[ole razzy]

Did you consider the possibility that you put Daniel off his lettuce hamash topped with piccalilly by staring at his feet? I mean dude, how damned inconsiderate can you get???

I put to much ketchup on my butty. When I took a bite out of it the red stuff dripped out onto the floor just missing his toe. I had to look down to check if an apology was necessary. It was then that the yellow terradactyl talons loomed large. I was thinking of whipping out my artists paintbrush and giving them a quick varnish but ...well....it was just to early in the morning and the hangover was still lingering!

[Dylan]

Dude, didn't you know that ketchup is Hallucinagenic around feet?

Even Dali was famous for the Hallucinagenic toenail!

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1424/1450191815_ff04603252.jpg&imgrefurl=http://flickr.com/photos/8302553%40N08/1450191815/&usg=__dccVp3SEqRfLTVV92bDv2VxGh9E=&h=768&w=1024&sz=119&hl=en&start=36&um=1&tbnid=PowOI1HKztCupM:&tbnh=113&tbnw=150&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dtoenail%2Binfection%26ndsp%3D18%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1I7GGLL_en-GB%26sa%3DN%26start%3D18%26um%3D1

[rogueelement]

I put to much ketchup on my butty. When I took a bite out of it the red stuff dripped out onto the floor just missing his toe. I had to look down to check if an apology was necessary. It was then that the yellow terradactyl talons loomed large. I was thinking of whipping out my artists paintbrush and giving them a quick varnish but ...well....it was just to early in the morning and the hangover was still lingering!

You mean you did,nt let his tyres down on the bike and save 300 carbon units by making the idiot walk instead of holding up traffic? Still I suppose we should all be grateful to these organ donors in waiting for keeping their body parts healthy.

[ole razzy]

He was pushing his elderly mother in her wheelchair. I scatterd a handful of tin tacs and bingo - the womble was down to a snails pace. I then called my friend Caroline who owns a black Hummer and asked her if she'd do an old soldier an favour. Should have seen the Womble's face when she pulled up on the slip and we manhandled the old dear into the front seat. "How many miles to the gallon does this do", he asked her. "oh...about two I think" came the reply. Then he almost choked when telling her he wanted to go home to St. Mary's!

Entire fiction btw but it killed 5 minutes whilst my BBQ is throwing clouds of black smoke over the next door neighbours laundry.

[Calimachon]

Glad you are a purist and use charcoal and have not given in to the dreaded gas bbq.  BTW don't use firelighters or firelighter fuel it definitely destroys the taste of the food.

Cali

[ole razzy]

Good advice Cali. I have a collection of driftwood for when BBQ'ing seafood and I use candian hickory for the red meat. I'm such a pretentious twit sometimes that I can only stand back in horror and imagine what other's make of such riduculous vanity.  Last summer I found that buring the Guardian also made for a more pleasurable flavour over my usual copy of The Times. Like I said - I'm a total cock when it comes to food preparation.

PS - I'm also a qualified cordon bleu chef, sadly not practising in a busy kitchen, who is not averse to making a bit on the side if anybody is throwing a dinner party and can't be arsed to cook, same goes for large outdoor functions and BBQ's starting at £20 ahead. Kosher supplied at no additional charge.  

The only thing I refuse to cook is Wimberely's toe nails.

[Pomme de terre]

You mean you did,nt let his tyres down on the bike and save 300 carbon units by making the idiot walk instead of holding up traffic? Still I suppose we should all be grateful to these organ donors in waiting for keeping their body parts healthy.

Quite agree Sparty. Anyone caught cycling between West Park and Bel Royal on La Route de st Aubin - selfishly holding me up in my Lambo - should be found guilty of an offence.

"Oi, tree hugger, you've got one of western Europe's finest cycle tracks over there. Get off the bloody Inner Road, you clown!"

Sorry, got held up by a wobbly cyclist today, needed to vent...

[Shiva]

Chill out Spud, Cyclists should be tolerated. After all they are Nature's way of keeping transplant organs fresh and healthy. You never know when you might need a Kidney.

[Pomme de terre]

Don't worry Shiva, it's only tongue in cheek. I would have cycled myself today, if it hadn't been so bloody windy on the front. What's all that about, in July?

[Malachi]

I might use the 'inner road' if it is very windy sometimes; usually, the traffic doesn't move quickly enough along there for cyclists to hold things up.

The cyclists that use Victoria Avenue are idiots though.

[ole razzy]

Hey guess what? I was down at the same cafe today, Reefs at harve des Pas, at about midday (the one that I saw Dan Wimberley at almost three months back with his fungal toe nails on full view) and he was there again! And would you believe it? He had the same sandles on but this time he was wearing white sports socks with them! Now side stepping the obvious fashion faux pas that Dan made when he got dressed this morning I couldnt help but wonder if he's read this thread and thought to himself - "I'm not gonna get caught out this time-no sireeee". Least its nice to know somebody reads planet jersey. Fnarr Fnarr.

I voted for him BTW. Vote green!

[Pomme de terre]

Admit it dude, you're stalking him...